If Online Dating seems awkward to you, that is because it is awkward and unnatural. I can recall going to interview a gal for a dating book I am writing and she told me; “I am not very good at this online dating stuff.” I told her “Don’t worry about it, no one is.” One of the worst complaints I see reoccurring with women daters is that they don’t like the bluntness of the hook-up crowd. I can see why, but let’s discuss this a little further shall we?
A gal writes to me her complaints about online dating: “Most guys are just looking for a “hook-up” no romancing, no date night or holding hands. It’s sad! Where are the men who want to talk a walk on the beach, go wine tasting or Catalina for a fun trip?”
Here is what I told her from the other side of the fence; Well, I guess I understand both points of view (horny guy point of view and the gal seeking a long-term relationship). I mean I am a guy and as I’ve gotten back into shape my Libido is like 3-times the normal now, but all this “hook-up” jazz is F-dangerous (pun intended) and now that I’ve turned 50 and now single again starting the 2nd half of my life, the last thing I want is some venereal disease. I just think it is a stupid, short-term play for guys to do that, but I get it, I mean I understand.
For her in this case, I doubt she’ll have to settle for anything less than she desires, I mean she is looking great, 44 and has everything going for her right? Myself, I like the romance too, it makes life worth living. Just straight sex without the rest of it, isn’t fulfilling more than that brief couple of hours. Anyway, I think we pretty much agreed on that.
Indeed, after considering her point of view, I had a thought. I was thinking about what she said, about all the “guys wanting hookups” and well, you can’t blame them for being men. And one problem is that the Men’s Magazines recommend this “Free Dating” site for guys who want hookups, they also recommend Tender and a couple of others, so that does bring the one-night-stand crowd. However, there are probably lots of other guys too.
In her case her pictures show her as quite the babe, so timid guys are probably not so likely to contact her right away, and guys who are only out for one-thing are like; “Hell Ya! Give me a piece of that” as soon as they see her pictures. There is one picture her on the dating site lying down in quite a provocative way and most guys are thinking, “hmm? she’d make a great girlfriend, I wouldn’t get tired of looking at her, and we could really be good together” and these are the types of things that go through guy’s minds right? I mean that is a known quantity.
Online Dating is a lot easier when men and women understand where each side is coming from, so please consider all this and think on it.